British parliamentarians in their silly attire. 

They come mostly in two or three categories: Corrupt or stupid, or – worst — both!

We’re talking about some of the world’s politicians (who’d probably do a better service as beauticians if not morticians) and lawmakers (who’d probably do a better service as lawnmowers).

This came to light following a recent survey in Britain that showcased that country’s most stupid laws.

The top 10 most stupid laws in Britain according to the survey are:

1. It is illegal to die in the Houses of Parliament (27 percent)

2. It is an act of treason to place a postage stamp bearing the British monarch upside-down (7 percent)

3. In Liverpool, it is illegal for a woman to be topless except as a clerk in a tropical fish store (6 percent)

4. Mince pies cannot be eaten on Christmas Day (5 percent)

5. In Scotland, if someone knocks on your door and requires the use of your toilet, you must let them enter (4 percent)

6. A pregnant woman can legally relieve herself anywhere she wants, including in a policeman’s helmet (4 percent)

7. The head of any dead whale found on the British coast automatically becomes the property of the king, and the tail of the queen (3.5 percent)

8. It is illegal to avoid telling the tax man anything you do not want him to know, but legal not to tell him information you do not mind him knowing (3 percent)

9. It is illegal to enter the Houses of Parliament in a suit of armor (3 percent)

10. In the city of York it is legal to murder a Scotsman within the ancient city walls, but only if he is carrying a bow and arrow (2 percent)

Don’t ask for an explanation on why the highly esteemed British lawmakers made these laws. For all you know, that’s against Stupid Law No. 11: Anybody who questions any British law will have his upper lip epoxied so that he’ll have a stiff upper lip!

But of course, American lawmakers would not be outdone by their Brit counterparts. Here are some of the most absurd laws in America:

1. In Alabama, it is illegal to wear a fake mustache that causes laughter in church.

2. In California, animals are banned from mating publicly within 1,500 feet of a tavern, school, or place of worship.

3. In Louisiana, it is illegal to rob a bank and then shoot at the bank teller with a water pistol.

4. In New York, a fine of $25 can be levied for flirting. This old law specifically prohibits men from turning around on any city street and looking “at a woman in that way.” A second conviction for a crime of this magnitude calls for the violating male to be forced to wear a “pair of horse-blinders” wherever and whenever he goes outside for a stroll.

5. Also, a license must be purchased before hanging clothes on a clothesline.

6. Also, the penalty for jumping off a building is death.

7. In Texas, a recently passed anti-crime law requires criminals to give their victims 24 hours notice, either orally or in writing, and to explain the nature of the crime to be committed.

8. The entire Encyclopedia Britannica is banned in Texas because it contains a formula for making beer at home.

9. In Florida, it is illegal to sing in a public place while attired in a swimsuit.

10. Also, men may not be seen publicly in any kind of strapless gown.

11. When having sex, only the missionary position is legal.

12. And the most absurd of them all is this Floridan law: Having sexual relations with a porcupine is illegal!

Ouch! Boy, Floridan guys must really be sex-starved to even think of doing it with a porcupine!

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