Mildew Wolf, one of the forgotten Hanna Barbara villains, never really achieved the status of Dick Dastardly or Muttly; Hanna Barbaraâ€™s premier bad guys. The reason for that is probably becauseâ€¦he just wasnâ€™t very evil.
But for everything he lacked in the evil-department, Mildew Wolf made up for ten-fold in flaming homosexual ambiguity. Probably the thing that made him so flamboyant was his voice. Itâ€™s hard to describe, butâ€¦okay, do you remember Samurai Pizza Cats?
Alright, so maybe that isnâ€™t the best example, but try real hard. Anyway, remember the guy who sang the theme song (â€œSamurai Pizza Cats! Theyâ€™re so bad! Theyâ€™ve got more fur than any turtle ever had!â€)? Well, Mildew Wolf sounded like THATâ€¦only considerably gayer.
It didnâ€™t help that, as one of the commentators for the All-Star Laff-a-Lympics, they paired him with Hanna Barbaraâ€™s second most flaming cartoon character, Snagglepuss, the effeminate pink mountain lion with an unsettling obsession for theater. Still, it was their flamboyant commentating mixed with the â€œAll-Starâ€ cast which made the show so entertaining.
But before his high-profile status in the All-Star Laff-a-Lympics, Mildew Wolf got his start in some stupid cartoon where he was trying to eat a lamb all the time but a sheep dog kept beating the crap out of him. I honestly canâ€™t remember what it was called, but the lamb had this annoying catchphrase that went â€œItâ€™s the Wool-ulf! Itâ€™s the Wool-ulf!â€
Those cartoons were especially disturbing because Mildew Wolf was less like a starving Wile E. Coyote and more like an overly-motivated Michael Jackson. Heâ€™d kidnap the lamb, who couldnâ€™t have been any older than Auggie Doggy, and try to carry him off to some secluded location, saying creepy stuff like â€œIâ€™ve got you now, my little tid-bitâ€. I think thereâ€™s a good reason they donâ€™t rerun those cartoons anymore.
So thatâ€™s all I have to say about Mildew Wolf, Hanna Barbaraâ€™s flaming pedophile. I suppose he wasnâ€™t an utterly terrible character, he just wasnâ€™t very good. Better than Mush Mouse and Pumpkin Puss, at least.